Scanxiety in Pregnancy After Loss

Things That Can Help with Scanxiety During Pregnancy After Loss

Talk About It…  with the Right People

• Validation is powerful. Share your fears with someone who gets it – a partner, friend, therapist, midwife, or a loss community (like TWGGE).

• Join peer support groups specifically for pregnancy after loss, where others understand scanxiety without needing explanations or receiving frustrating advice like ‘just try to stay positive’! 🙄

Grounding & Calming Techniques

• Guided meditations or breathing exercises (like the three minute one below).

• Try 5-4-3-2-1 grounding (naming things you can see, hear, feel, smell, taste) right before or during the wait.

• Use calming scents (lavender oil, familiar perfume) on a tissue to bring comfort and familiarity.

Plan for the Day of the Scan

• Bring a support person if possible – someone who can be calm, grounded, and advocate for you.

• Ask the clinic in advance for trauma-informed care: things like shorter waiting times, going straight in, or having a midwife present.

• Wear something that makes you feel safe or comforted – a scarf from someone who loves you, a grounding bracelet, etc.

Distraction + Comfort Kit

• Load your phone with comfort podcasts, music, or audiobooks to listen to while you wait.

• Bring a comfort object, a stone, a piece of jewelry, a note to yourself.

• Have snacks or water on hand — nourishment matters, especially when nerves mess with your stomach.

Create a Ritual

• Write a note to yourself before the scan,  something like “Whatever happens, I will meet myself with kindness.”

• Light a candle the night before. Say a mantra. Look at a photo of someone who gives you strength.

• These small rituals help create meaning and grounding, especially when things feel out of control.

Prepare with the Healthcare Professional

• Let them know in advance about your anxiety. Ask for:

  • A clear step-by-step of what will happen during the scan

  • To see or not see the screen right away, it’s your choice

  • Someone to speak first (e.g., “I’ll let you know as soon as I see a heartbeat”)

Be Kind to Yourself

• It’s okay to dread the scan and still hope.

• It’s okay to protect your heart while also allowing some excitement.

• There’s no “right” way to do this – only your way.

A Moment to Breathe

To support you in these moments, Tahnee Knowles created us a simple, grounding Three Minute Breathing Space Meditation. Whether you’re listening on your headphones in the waiting room before your scan, or sat in the car park before heading in, or even in bed the night before, this short guided practice is designed to help you pause, reset, and return to yourself.

This isn’t about “thinking positive” or pretending the fear isn’t there. It’s about making space to feel what you’re feeling, while gently reconnecting with your breath and your body, one moment at a time.

⚠️ Just a Little Heads-Up: This meditation is best listened to when you’re not driving, juggling life, or operating anything with sharp blades. Find a quiet-ish spot where you can sit, breathe, and just be for a few minutes.

It’s not meant to replace proper medical or mental health support (because breathing is amazing, but it’s not magic). If you’re struggling, please speak to someone you trust or a professional who gets it. You don’t have to do this alone.

What You Might Experience:

• A drop in physical tension (shoulders, jaw, stomach)

• A steadier breath and heartbeat

• A quiet moment of connection with yourself, your body, and your hopes

No meditation experience is needed. Just press play, close your eyes if you’d like, and let yourself be guided.

For You, Wherever You Are

This moment is yours. Take it gently.

You’re doing something incredibly brave. Let’s breathe together.